Monday, November 5, 2012

You Can't Make Me

"You Can't Make Me (But I Can Be Persuaded) by Cynthia Ulrich Tobias is a book devoted to helping us bring out the best in our strong-willed children. I have to admit I was very intrigued by this book because I have a very independent, strong four year old. I don't believe this to be a bad thing, but it does seem to create some conflict, so I was open to any suggestions as to how to nurture her independence rather than try and change it.

One of the most helpful pieces of advice that I took away from this book was changing the way that I reacted to conflict with my daughter. Rather than issue an ultimatum, giving her a "do this or else" attitude, Tobias suggests using a positive reinforcement to achieve peace. I found this to be particularly useful with my own strong-willed child. I also really liked that Tobias took the time to explain the mentality of a strong-willed child, based on age, from toddler years through young adults, giving a simple, but thorough explanation of their mentality and mindset at each age. It really does help to understand what your child is thinking and helps you craft a better response when conflict arises.

I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has a strong-willed child in their life. I think it was so important to understand that independent and strong-willed children aren't "difficult", but they just have a different approach to their way of thinking, and we have to adjust how we approach them when it comes to discipline and rules.

FTC DISCLOSURE: I received this book for free from in exchange for an honest review. I was not obligated to write a positive review.

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